The Eyes of Comedy

Heyyyyy! How the hell are ya?!

Its been 4 days since my last entry forgive me bloggers for I have sinned. Its Monday again and again I am utterly exhausted. I went to sleep at 3am last night and barely began my dream when I had to get up again. This working 7 days a week is putting me on the border of delirium. Lack of sleep causes many every day tasks to become extremely difficult, such as operating a motor vehicle, attempting to have a logical conversation, and walking. Right now their is a little low battery light flashing on the top left hand side of my vision. Beep...beep...beep.

SATURDAY'S ALL DAY FILM SHOOT
As you can tell from the above title it was busy this weekend. The day started at 8am kicking and screaming because I did not want to leave the euphoria of my bed. My roommate/general assistant had a prior engagement - ( a new job) and could not make it to the shoot. Being that I'm only comfortable driving in Manhattan and have a fear of parking my car in any of the other 5 boroughs especially Brooklyn I decided to take the subway instead. It took me ass long to get to my destination. When I finally arrived all I did was wait around for the crew to set up. We were supposed to get through 2 sketches by days end however this did not transpire as the script was changed completely the day before and we had to make the necessary adjustments. While annoying you must expect such things working in this business. Some of the cast and crew seemed very irritable because of this but I did not let it effect me. Whenever something stressful happens I simple say to myself, "At least your not with the assholes", of course I'm referring to a certain group I used to work for (See past blogs). After that I'm right as rain and ready for anything. I do thank the ASSHOLES for building up my patience. The important thing is that we got the sketch done and ready for editing. I went home that night feeling drained and yet it took me very long to fall asleep. When I finally did, I dreamt of sleeping.

SUNDAY STAND UP
Sundays is always a fun day. Its full of writing meetings, production rehearsals, many wise cracks and a few altercations. I spend the day working into the night. The atmosphere of the village is so vibrant with people from every walk of life. They only common denominator, they all pass in front of our comedy club. Yes, tonight at this moment it is our club and no one else's. We man the doors, we bark and beckon people into the club, we are the performers for the evening. As the sun goes down more and more people we know appear with stories of the week's events. Some comics show up hoping to score a spot on the show some how. I admire their dedication but it gets lost in their insistence. As the night rides on we stand outside in front of the club listening to the music flowing from the bar and the laughter from inside the club. Who is up next? How did your set go? What kind of audience was it? These sentences ring constant in different circles of conversation. The night wears on and I'm told, "Your up next", the sick feeling of nervous lives in my stomach. I kiss my ring TwiCe for luck and try not to think to much. I reluctantly purchase a beer and now I'm on my second hoping the seal doesn't burst while I'm onstage. The other comics hide in the shadows toward the back of the room, silently preparing, judging, and observing. Now the host is ready to bring me up, his eyes search the room to make sure I didn't flee. He gives them one more joke and introduces me as I walk to the stage.

All alone with a room full of strangers I am elevated and in front a row of hot lights. I can barely see more than shadows but I know every eye in the room is fixated on me. They are waiting, to laugh, to boo, or worse to stay in silence. As I take the microphone off the stand all my nervous of fear transform into confidence that fills every joint of my body. My blood is flowing faster and my heart is alive. My senses increase and I'm aware of every inch of that room. In less than in instant all of these elements come together and suddenly the internal comedy switch is flipped to on. Now it doesn't matter anymore, now I'm flying, now it is my time to shine or fall, now I'm in the moment and now I am living. Everything that has happened before this does not matter anymore, now I exist again. If I'm lucky, an era of timelessness begins, a feeling of slow motion. I can live a thousand lifetimes in a second and let them see my world with my eyes. Every movement graceful, every word articulate, every point perfection. As suddenly as it began the moment halts. With that, a red light glows telling me my time is over. In the span of a few minutes I've made a few friends and possibly a few enemies. I exit to the sound of rousing applause and all is well for now in this comic's world.

Until Next Time - Keep Laughing

Master deBaters

Hello friends. It's the beginning of a new month, the start of the weekend, and payday! I'm looking forward to sleeping in, laying in various states of vegetation, and not dealing with good for nothing yuppies.

Saturday I shall have to arise at an unGodly hour to make it to a shoot in Brooklyn again. We are shooting two sketches back to back which will take an entire day. It is hard work and that is exactly what I enjoy about it. Last night I was up late writing when the boss called. He wanted to make some revisions to my scripts, in fact he asked me to change the entire thing from start to finish. I was a little indifferent to making such drastic cuts on the eve of a filming but I have to admit he does have good ideas. I was trying to decide if the writer in me was fighting to keep the congruence of the piece or if the comedian within me agreed that the script did need punching up. In either case, the actor in me will always adapt. Although I'm not sure how tasteful it is to have a character farting out a window, I do know it can be really funny if done right. We shall see.

Last night was also the presidential debate which I caught most of. I must say, George Bush is a bigger moron that I originally thought. It was painfully obviously he didn't bother to prepare at all which I believe is a personal insult to the American public. He constantly stumbled his words, became agitated, was visibly nervous, and even acted arrogant. All he did was repeat and reword the same lines never really answering any of the questions posed to him. The best attack he could come up with over and over again was that Kerry was a flip-flop. Bush is the biggest lieing, murdering, vile, ignorant, cheating, so called poor excuse for a President ever in office. It amazes me that the people support him at all. How some of his biggest supporters ironically are the very same people he hurts the most. I also think the polls are misrepresenting this race and they're are a lot more Kerry supporters. Ever since Bush came into office I have doubted everything I see on the news, everything I read in the papers, I've doubted my freedom. Even writing this blog makes me nervous but nerves won't stop me from speaking up that's for sure.

PRESIDENT KERRY, (as far as I'm concerned he is my President), was well spoken, intelligent, articulate and clear on his message. You could see he did his research and had a strong grasp on the facts. This is a man who actually fought for his country and understands what it means to sacrifice. He also understands the importance of including the world on his foreign policies. That we are all in this swift boat together, clever aren't I.

Kerry is the only choice and everyone knows it.

Until Next time - Register and vote.

Somewhere in T.V. Land

It has been 2 days since my last post. It seems that in order for me to reach a computer to post this blog I must first face harrowing obstacles and battle unpredictable circumstances, exiting unscathed.

*Metal in My Rubber

Monday night I went out on a munchy run and on the way back heard a thumping as if I had a flat tire. Upon further investigation I discovered a peice of metal lodged smack in the middle of my back tire. Being that their was a potential for catastrophe, I completely ignored the problem but used it as a great excuse not to go into work the next morning. Instead of using that time to fix the tire I caught up on some sleep probably risking life and limb for the ride to work the next morning. I did make it to work and dropped off the car at a Sears Auto Center near by. I bring in the car for a simple tire fix and recieve a call from them asking for $200 to fix a legion of other problems.

-My brakes are failing - Big deal.

-My exhausts is falling off - Who cares.

-The car may explode - Tell me something new.

Anyway, I told them to fix the tire.

*LLEGAMOS T.V. Taping

Despite the rain, or should I say typhoon, we had a great show. As you know it is taped live at the improv comedy club every tuesday night. This week we had an author and finalist in this years Sundance Film Festival - Sofia Quintero. Also musical guest Q-Unique and the very funny comedian D.C. Benny of Last Comic Standing and a Comedy Central half hour special. This week I played a character named, "Eleganzia" (Elegance). I recieved the script a few hours before the show and quickly decided on a costume. I wore an open collared shirt with a thin black mustache and sunglases. He was to enter and explain to our host what he must do to be a proper star. Although it was a very short cameo appearence it is important to have a well rounded character to acheive comedic affect. If I don't beleive me or care about this persona, neither will any audience. The skit went over very well with our audience. In fact all the comedy bits went over very well, the entire show is entertaining from start to finish.

It's easy when you have the opportunity to work with such a fantastic cast and crew. I'm not the type to blow smoke up butts but I have to say this particular group of people are a pleasure to work with. They are professional, dedicated, and talented. From the actors to the camera men to the directors, they all do a phenomenal job of making this show fly. For the first time in a long time I don't feel stressed and I actually enjoy the work. They allow us creative freedom and a chance to explore comedic possiblity. These people have become my friends as well as business associates and with the integrity of their work their is no limit to what we can acheive. With each show their is more improvment and I can honestly say that this show has class and quailty. It demonstrates our strenths as latinos and proves that our culture isn't to much different from everyone elses. We are all human after all.

Until next time my fellow humans - Farewell.

Links:

http://www.dcbenny.com

http://www.speakersandartists.org/People/SofoaQuintero.html

http://hiphop.discogs.com/artist/Q-Unique

Weekend Adventures

This weekend was an adventure indeed. So much so that I am falling asleep at my desk this morning. zzzz.....zz....zzzzz.....HUH! WHA! Oh. Hey :)

Fri - & Saturday night I tried to rest as much as I could - falling in and out of sleep,in between working on the show, these two days are fuzzy at best. Who knows, I could still be dreaming this very moment.

Sunday was a freakin long day, I chose to use the word freakin to emphazie how utterly streched out it was. The day started at 8am, after I resurrected, my roomate and I left for Brooklyn to a film shoot. I'd like to mention that my roomate is also the PA for our show as well as the sound guy. When we reached Brooklyn we met up with the cast and crew to film a sketch called "Latincular", a very funny commercial spoof. We had a new make-up girl for the day, also a couple of other females that were cast in the day's shoot. Now being that we are all extremely busy individuals, most of us don't get a chance to socialize. So that when a pretty girl is within reach its understandable that human nature overtake you. However, when you have 10 men attacking 1 female for attention the results ae not favorable, especially for the poor victim. I think we should have the sexual harassment suits handy to save time. Most females like all the hoopla, at first they act surprised, then flattered, then they strut about in total confidence choosing who may endow them with compliments as if picking cherries from an endless cherry tree. That is why I have chosen to ignore any female on the set completly, not out of respect, out of strategy.

As soon as we wrapped (Thats showbiz talk for we finished) off we went to our writers meeting. This was a session of attempting to come up with material while battling to stay awake. We lost one of the writers as soon as he hit the couch. We did manage to come up with what I think is a very funny bit about voicemail left for the show by fans.

Finally we ended up at the Boston Comedy Club, where as we do every week, hang out in the bar directly underneath the club. On Sundays they have open mics for anyone and I mean anyone to perform. Since they won't let us upstairs into the actual comedy club until 6pm we are forced to sit their trying to work while listening to what looks like a homeless guy playing a bongo or some sort of home made instrument. This week however, they had a very good jazz band that made my hips involuntarily shake.

We made it above into the club and all of us collapsed. The scene looked like a bear cave, with serveral people lying around in various states of hibernation. When the show started around 9:30pm I was doing better. I had a grilled McChicken, smoked a dobey, and the night was young. The crowd was a good size and a little weird. They would laugh and immediately become silent with each joke. So naturally when my turn came I called them out on it which made them laugh..... and then immediately become silent again. I did have a good set and felt as if I had a grow spurt of discovery. I'm picking up alot from the other comics in our group and we try to help eachother with our acts. Usually a comedian doesn't have that luxery because of the competition involved, this is a cut throat business after all. Since you have the every man for himself mentality it's difficult to gauge who is with you or against you. We have a tremendous advantage that we are all secure in this T.V. show and don't need to have that attitude.

Speaking of which, The LLEGAMOS T.V. show preimered last night on LTV - Latin Television!! Alright! Its anyone's guess as to where the hell its actually airing or on what cable stations but Hooray - we hit the big time of small time cable!

Check your local listings and if you have LTV, do me a favor - record it for me :)

Until Next Time - Watch the Channels

I'm Alive!

Well folks the results from my check-up are in, with the exception of my high Cholesterol, blood circulation and heart murmur I'm in tip top shape!

I'm just glad it Friday, I'm burnt out from the week and need a little R&R. The New York Comedy Club called to book me for spots this weekend, but with my schedule lately and all the work I have on the T.V. show, one must know when to take time for oneself.

So I get a call yesterday from a comic friend of mine that is closely attached to a certain theatre group in NYC that I used to work for. Out of professional courtesy I shall not mention said theatre group here even though they aren't very professional. So for all intensive purposes I shall refer to them as, "The Assholes". Anyway this particular person I happen to respect, it's the rest of them I don't care for. He asked me why I haven't called or shown my face in a month. I wanted to say, "Because after working for "The Assholes", for so many years being treated like an outcast, having lies spread about me, not be appreciated, respected, or payed I decided to take my business elsewhere. I did not say the above, again out of respect for my friend who often was put in the middle.

Why am I posting this? Becasue I want to let all those beginning Actors, Comedians, Singers, and general Entertainers know that even if you don't posses the experience that does not mean you should be treated like dirt. I poured blood sweat and tears into that group and while I gained much as an artist it was without their help. This business is full of people that talk the talk but don't walk the walk. Directors that cherish their powers more than they love the craft. Producers who make you believe they are working for your best interests when really your working for theirs. Be realistic when going to auditions and don't be taken by the, "Your going to be a star", mentality. Its just a business based on making money and you are the product. Honestly look at where you are in your career and take the projects for what they are, a credit, a learning experience, a stepping stone toward a better gig. Many of you already know these facts but it's always good to reiterate. These people have no control over your career - only you do.

So NOW after trashing me for no reason what so ever besides extreme jealousy, they want me for a future show. THEY CAN KISS MY BROWN ASS!!! Hows that for control.

On that note - HAPPY FRIDAY!

Until we meet again.

A Spoonful of Sugar

Greetings from cyber space, Today I have a doctors appointment to get a full physical. If left to my own devices cruel and unusual things can happen. I got bored and decided to check the popular website, WebMD. By the end of my session I was convinced I had several diseases, everything from Lymphoma to Diabetes. So the only way to be at peace is to go to the doctors office and demand I receive every test known to modern medicine.

I tell ya, getting an appointment is quite a task. Now I know why Doctors go to school for so long, so they can never work. Every office I called had a different rule or excuse:

"Sorry the doctor only works Tuesdays and Thursdays"

"You need a referral in order to see this doctor"

"We don't take United Health Care for physicals"

"He only works every other full moon during the leap year"

I mean, come on! The receptionists act as if you just stumbled upon their secret society and only the elite are allowed proper health care. It's also strange how the service improves the further North you travel. In my town, where us minorities live, you may walk in for a check-up and walk out with an amputated limb. Not to mention you have to wait in a 4ft by 4 ft room with 80 other patients with highly contagious diseases. On the positive side most of these offices have many services - Doctor/Insurance/Cell Phone Outlet so you can get a tax refund on your new cell phone in the middle of surgery.

So today I will opt to drive a bit north and pray that they don't discover some new rare disease that only I have.

Until next time - IF their is a next time

Over the Hump Wed.

Hello all or Myself, Today is Wednesday, jeez only the middle of the week. On my way to New York yesterday I was almost killed by a Welsh Farms truck # 182. Ya know those trucks with a big cows ass on the rear door. I was driving my little ford behind him when suddenly he stops in the middle of the road. My only warning were his white reverse lights before he gunned it, full speed, right toward me. All I see is this huge cow ass about to sit on me. Without a second thought I switched into reverse and began to back up into a car that was behind me! Playing a reverse Cat & Mouse game while blaring my horn I went as far as I could before ramming into the poor guy behind me. Luckliy and not a moment sooner the truck came to a screechng halt just inches from my front bumper. What was this guy smoking? As if that weren't odd enough, he then jerks forward and decides to come to a complete stop, blocking the road. I sat their with a line of cars hoking the horn to no avail. Finally we all decided to reverse out of the road. Thank you God for protecting this fragile soul.

Well Last nights LLEGAMOS TV Show's live taping at the Improv was awsome. It was a packed house and the audience had a lot of energy. I couldn't beleive how exited they were. We invited a comic by the name of Angry Bob to do a sketch with us and it went over very well, he is quite the character. George our host seemed out of it before the show, which made me worried, but as soon as those cameras turned on he became a different person.

My new sketch, "Salsa" went great! Wardrobe got me this ridiculous costume with this huge mustache. They got me this big puffy muti-colored dress shirt with ruffless that made me feel like a parrot. I also had two very fine ladies as my Salsa girls come on stage with me. It was a lot of fun. The good thing about writing your own material is that when you play the part, no research is required. I can reach the core of the character in an instant because it came from me.

We also had a very talented comedian on the show by the name of Peeches Rodriguez. I actually met her about a year ago when she DJed for a stand up show we did. I recognized her and said, "Aren't you the DJ?" She replied, "You didn't know I'm a comedian as well." And she was a very talented comic indeed. After the show she came up to me, "I heard you do a Freddie Prinze impression, where can I catch that?" I nodded and told her where I would be performing next month. She grabs me by the hand and pulls me away from the crowd in front of the club. She then tells me how much Freddie Prinze has inspired her career and really expressed her feeling toward him with great emotion. I of course share her emotion for Freddie.

Its amazing to me how many people Freddie Prinze has touched. His success was so short and yet he managed to accomplish so much. I constantly meet people who share their expereince of Freddie and how he inspired them. I can only hope to spread my humor and try to change the world as he did.

Until next time - Keep smiling.

Weekends a Busy

This blog is really for my future self to read, I hardly think anyone cares to read this blog out of the millions of them out there. Anyhoot, in case I reach one soul.

This weekend was pretty standard. I was slated to shoot a few skits at the Bronx Zoo but hence the producers cancelled due to what they called, "A complication with the zoo". I wasn't too disappointed since it was raining cats and dogs or should I said Lions and Bears.

Every Sunday is the comedy show at the Boston Comedy Club in the Villiage. I love the Villiage people. It's one of the few bohemian places left in the city. I consider myself to be a conservative hippy and enjoy their company.

The show started at 9:45pm - kinda late. I went up first, after the host of course, and while the audience seemed a bit subdued by the end of my set I felt I had bought their energy up at least a notch or two. It was a smaller crowd, about 25 people. I find you can work the crowd more and my material less with a crowd like that, you have to get more personal in order to win them over.

Jim Norton of Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn fame stopped by and did a set. I think its interesting that once your on T.V. you can come in and pretty much crash any room you want. While I understand the need for semi-celebs to give the room credibility I can not understand bumping another comedian simply on the fact that he isn't on T.V. In any case, as he was leaving, I shook his hand in recognition as I do all of the other comics and off he went back to T.V. land.

Today, Monday, I'm beyond tired but I have to pay the bills so here I am at my day job. Ahh Corporate America, surrounded by yuppies. At least I killed some time writing this blog on company time ;) Until next time - I bid you Adue.

Meeting with a Star

Greetings, Yesterday afternoon I had a very exciting day, I met the great Paul Rodriguez. A very talented comedian who is one of the Latin Kings of comedy. I remember first seeing him in a hilarious movie called, "Born in East L.A." starring Cheech Marin, when I was about 11 years old.

Our show called, "LLEGAMOS" (we've arrived) got in interview with him and I, being a cast member of the show, tagged along.

We entered the Laugh Factory in Time Square, which I have never been in. What a big place. I hope to play there one day soon. We were seated in the main area, where their was a big stage with a neon backdrop that said, "Laugh Factory" illuminated. The crew busied themselves with setting up lights and camera while I sat on stage under the hot lights pretending to be famous. Then right on time, in walks Paul. He looked at ease and in shape and gave us 20 min more than we asked.

He spoke of many things, among them the late great Freddie Prince Sr. and the comedy of Cantinflas, the Mexican Chaplin. I never knew that Paul served in the U.S. Airforce and also that his son has won Gold in the X-games for skateboarding. All in all it was a very interesting conversation which will be airing in a few weeks on LTV (Latin Television) so check your listings.

My boss and host of the show was very please because Paul anointed him a "Sir" of comedy. Now we won't hear the end of that one for at least 3 to 4 weeks.

Well, thank God its Friday, I got a paycheck from my day job and can eat again, lol. Their are many facts I haven't revealed yet because I'm not sure if I want to remain anonymous. Perhaps this blog will be more intriguing that way.

With that said - Until next time - God Speed.

Links: - http://www.paulrodriguez.com/

9/16/04 Hello Myself

This is my first blog. I decided to document my experiences with the world, or the 3 folks that may read this because like everyone else, it is my unique perspective. I am a Comedian in New York City. That's basically the extent to my uniqueness.